The path won’t be made easy. You will meet many obstacles along the way, but this is how it is when you truly fight for your freedom. Often this is an internal battle. It is an internal battle of not allowing the thoughts and opinions of others to direct you. It is the internal battle of not allowing others to direct your life.
They have their own values, their own ideas of what makes them feel good and what they need. People often subconsciously project this onto others, thinking that other people will need the same things that they do, and if they just give them the right direction, then they will be successful on their path. With parents, they desperately want you to succeed and be well taken care of. Therefore, if they have never taken risks along their path, they will want to ensure that you stay safe by doing the same. Comfort is safety. But risks are what make us truly come alive.
Taking the risk of following your heart, is taking the risk of creating your own path. You are not here to be like anyone else, not your parents, not your siblings, not your mentors, not your peers. You, and you alone. You must reclaim your own internal compass. Make decisions based on your own preferences and values. Other people’s needs are not necessarily identical to your own. What do you need to feel good? What do you need to feel balanced? What do you need to feel fulfilled? People will spend their whole lives trying to make these decisions for you. Do not let them. Reclaim your power. You are the master of your own life, and this includes being the master of your time, energy, and the choices and decisions that you make. This is your power, and your power alone. Deep in your heart, you always know what’s best for you. Trust.
Each time you allow others to dictate your life choices, to decide for you, to dictate how you spend your time, how you spend your energy, what you eat, what you pursue, you are giving your power away. You are giving your power away and telling yourself that you cannot do it on your own. You are telling yourself that you cannot trust yourself to make the best decisions for you. You are not trusting your own voice. Reclaim your truth, reclaim your power, and even if you feel like you don’t have all the answers (which, let’s be honest, none of us do), you will figure it out along the way.
Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life’s longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.
You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow,
which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them,
but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.
You are the bows from which your children– Khalil Gibran
as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite,
and He bends you with His might
that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let our bending in the archer’s hand be for gladness;
For even as He loves the arrow that flies,
so He loves also the bow that is stable.
Libra is a sign of balance, relationships, others, beauty, art, symmetry and so much more.
Today is the full moon in Libra. Naturally, being a night owl I tend to feel more creative under a full moon. I have been especially inspired with this one, experiencing profound and unique expressions of Libra energy.
Tune in to hear my perspective on Libra energy explored through a beauty lens.
Themes explored: Memoirs of a Geisha, Miss Congeniality, appreciating different types of beauty, cultivating beauty, the rise of cosmetic surgery & achieving a perfected ideal of beauty. I also explore the shadow side of Libra from a beauty lens. If you love beauty and spirituality, this is for you ♡
Featured image from: Instagram/@kkwbeauty
Creativity & Emptiness
When I was younger, I really wanted to express myself. I wanted to sing, I wanted to dance, I wanted to be seen. 7 years ago I wanted to start a blog. I was so excited. I told my friends about it. I would call it, “A dip in consciousness“. I had always been fascinated by spirituality and wanted to document all of the thoughts racing through my mind. I never started that blog. I let that idea float, gently sinking into the bottom of my mind- taking its last breath in the processional of all the ideas I never brought to life. Logically, that entire sentence does not make sense. Even from a poetic sense. But that’s exactly how it feels, when you begin to bring a dream to life, only to let it drift and float away.
Why didn’t I start that blog? Well, 7 years ago, I was a far cry from the confident, little girl I had been. Puberty had hit me like a brick wall. Not only had it changed my body, but it shattered my confidence. Was it puberty? Or was it the slow moving away from that energetic, exuberant child I had once been? Slowly, I started to sweep my childlike dreams away under a heavy, old rug. I replaced those dreams with the dreams of those around me. I drowned my voice, and donned a mask. I was water. Gently flowing and adapting to anything around me. Like clay, ready to be moulded. All this bright potential. With everyone around me deciding how it should be expressed. I lost my voice. Drowning in a sea of others. I lost myself.
I think deep inside of us, we all have something wanting to be expressed. I held that expression in for so long. The correctional officer, living inside my mind, always telling me it was better to be silent than to risk disapproval. I kept my thoughts to myself, trying to create an image of perfection. That image, only being possible when I did not say, do or embody anything that would create direct conflict in my environment. Everything was always done to achieve a certain reaction around me. I didn’t even realize I had built and created my own self imposed prison.
I think when we feel empty inside, it’s because we are not touch with our truth. We don’t allow ourselves to sing, dance, play or express ourselves without constant internal censorship. Maybe we are choosing to pursue someone else’s dream. Or avoiding taking risks, because of fear.
The journey back to yourself is not an easy one. It’s filled with so many twists and turns. Sometimes it feels like you take 100 steps forward, only to tumble and fall down a giant canyon, 5 years backwards. You never really know what to expect. But in truth, growth is not linear. It is all cyclical. The journey back to yourself often involves a maze of exhausting all other pathways. The road to success- that we believe to be our heart’s desire, but which reveals itself to be a quest for validation of our self worth.
So I ask you this- if no one was watching- what song would you sing? What words would you write? What story would you tell? If no one was watching- what would you do for fun?
This is how you get back to your creative well. The artist who picks up the brush and simply paints the canvas, without thinking about what it will get them in return.
Creativity has become a distorted imbalance. A display of how each one of us can wield and manipulate our expression to receive the most social validation- that’s if you let it become that way. When we create or move from a place of wanting to fill that emptiness with external applause, praise or validation- it isn’t long before we feel empty inside. Like a dragon, ravenous with hunger, we devour our prey. Then, we are simply left with that feeling of emptiness again. Creativity in its purest form, is simply about expression. Energy which moves and is transformed. Energy which flows.
With that kept in mind- next time your create something, ask yourself- am I doing this for me? When you create from your own inner well, the act of creation itself fulfills you. The act of creation itself, is deeply moving. It is alchemy in motion. Devotion in its highest form. You will know it by the way that it feels. When the simple act of creation itself, lifts your spirits, rather than the waiting period of external reactions around you. Learning to tap into this creative power, is one of the most fulfilling things we can do.
Click below to listen to this article
Ego is something that is often talked about in a negative light. There are people who say you should not have any ego or that ego is a bad thing. I think the problem is that there is a so much misunderstanding and misinformation about what ego actually is.
There is the light side of ego and the shadow side of ego. One isn’t necessarily better than the other, they are simply opposite expressions of energy. They point to different soul paths that people have chosen. When you look at things from a spiritual perspective, it’s very objective. You don’t necessarily see things as being better or less than, you simply see them as being different expressions of energy.
Ego is not a bad thing. Ego is your personality, your identity, it’s the part of you that represents your individuality in the world. We are all spiritual beings having a human experience and ego is necessary for us to do this. If we didn’t have ego there would be no separation or division between us, which is necessary for us to have the individual experience. There would also be no duality; duality is how we grow, how we experience lessons and expand our horizons. Life is a beautiful dance of each person being a different painting of the divine.
Ego can be really positive. For example judgement in its negative form is destructive criticism and judgement in its positive, exalted form is creating rules and setting boundaries for what is right, what is not right and for protecting people as well as the energy of being clear, discerning, and discriminating. Judgement in its highest form is actually very healthy and very necessary for us.
It’s very clear and obvious to me when I see a comment that is coming from the wounded ego. That was the inspiration for this post.
1. Disrespect: sign of emotional immaturity
The first sign of wounded ego is disrespect. If somebody is disagreeing with you with disrespect, that is a sign of emotional immaturity and it is definitely a sign of coming from the wounded ego. If you voice your opinion about something somebody else’s response to you is very cutting or negative- or simply disrespectful in terms of their tone- this is very telling. Often times people will use both tactics, being disrespectful with their tone, words and how they approach things. Often times this can be done is subtle and covert ways. It might not be as obvious as a toxic hate comment like, “go kill yourself”. It may be something more hidden and “your opinion shows your lack of intelligence” which is just rude and condescending. So anytime you see someone speaking towards you or treating you disrespectfully that is a sign of wounded ego.
Even if you need to have a difficult conversation there is a way to express yourself with tact, respect and clarity. When you express yourself that way it actually creates bridges whereas expressing yourself with disrespect creates division.
2. All or nothing, black or white mentality
“I’m right your wrong, I’m big your small and there’s nothing you can do about it!”– Matilda
This is the inability to think outside of one perspective or opinion. This is part of the wounded ego that feels the need to attack or defend.
This is the ego that gets threatened extremely easily and will attack anything that feels threatening to them. The inability to see outside of one’s own views, mindset or opinion, or the inability to see outside of another’s views, mindset or opinion- is a sign of a closed third eye. A closed third eye is blocked by opinion, whether it is your own, or another’s. It is the inability to discern between what is real versus what is unreal, and the inability to see outside of opinion, whether it’s one’s own or the opinion of another.
Wounded ego keeps you traumatized. If you are responding from wounded ego you are seeing through a skewed lens.
This is someone who is constantly projecting their true feelings, or negative things about themselves onto others. Keep in mind that projection can work both ways. People coming from a grandiose ego will often project the shadow aspects about themselves onto those who are coming from an underdeveloped ego. Often times, those with an under developed ego will project all of the positive qualities about themselves onto others, and as such will be a match to people who project all of their negative qualities onto others.
4. Everything is done for show
Perhaps the most telltale sign of unhealthy ego is when everything is done for show. The strategy here is to convey a specific image and convince others that the image is real, when in truth it is not.
5. Superiority/inferiority mindset
Unhealthy ego involves seeing yourself as better than or less than others. We often think of unhealthy ego in obvious, negative ways. For example, condescension- is fairly obvious and comes across as very negative. However, those of us who suffer from low feelings of self-worth, lack of self-esteem, tend to see ourselves as less than others. This is harmful to ourself and draws us towards those who see themselves as better than others. Often times this goes both ways. Those who see themselves as above others will also see themselves as below and vice versa. One classic example of this, is the smear campaign of a narcissist. Narcissists are constantly comparing themselves to others. When they come across someone they perceive to be better than themselves, they need to degrade them in order to feel better about themselves. This is not exclusive to narcissistic behaviour. Society teaches us to constantly compare ourselves with one another, and compete with one another. Therefore, this internal judgement, inferiority/superiority complex, is actually quite common and something we all come across, when coming from the wounded ego. One of the most widespread examples of this, is the inner need to destroy beauty. The wounded ego consciousness teaches us that beauty is limited. As such, any other display of beauty is a threat. This is why so many seek to internally or externally strip others of beauty, in order to feel confident and secure within themselves.
Watch the full video below
1. Everything is my fault
This is when we self blame, take more responsibility than is healthy including taking responsibility for the thoughts, actions, feelings, emotions and inner states of others. We do this because of our wounded inner child that says “Everything is my fault”. This wound will attract the polar opposite wound which says, “Nothing is my fault”. Often times, this is the narcissist who cannot accept responsibility for their actions because to accept responsibility would be to disrupt their inflated and false self image of their goodness and greatness.
2. Very sensitive, intuitive, empathic = natural lack of boundaries
This is the tendency to internalize the energy of others due to a natural lack of boundaries. This is where in our pure innocence, we internalize the energy of others without questioning it for ourselves to discern whether the things they say to us or about us are true or not. In this way we do not truly know ourselves because we do not know where others end and where we begin.
3. Addiction to negative emotions
This is the addiction to drama, negative emotions, self-sabotage, self-destruction. It is the emotional manifestation of cutting. People who cut themselves cut because it makes them feel better than what they were feeling before. It makes them feel a sense of control over their pain which feels better than complete powerlessness to one’s pain. Powerlessness is the ultimate despair.
Emotions and drama can be highly addictive, but in order to feel those really high highs, they need to be juxtaposed with really low lows. The appeal of emotional addiction is in the distraction it brings. If we are constantly caught up in our own life drama it gives us the opportunity to escape ourselves, and to satisfy that longing and desire to experience fulfilment, to experience excitement, to feel like a movie star in our own lives. In other words, it’s a roundabout way to feel like the star of our own lives. But instead of going directly for that by sitting in our power, when addicted to negative emotions we go for it by centering our lives around different sources of drama; in this case, that source of drama being narcissists, who are by nature, kings and queens of drama as they are also seeking that distraction to feed their addiction as well.
4. Victim Consciousness
As long as we are choosing to play the victim in our lives- whether consciously or subconsciously, we will be susceptible to perpetrators- those who project the vulnerable aspects of themselves onto others to terrorize and traumatize their own inner child. Whether this is a bully, a narcissist or simply anyone seeking to escape themselves through overpowering another, as long as we feel powerless to ourselves and powerless to our lives, we are subconsciously operating from victim mode.
5. Poor Self-Image
Placing others on pedestals, while not seeing the best in yourself. This is where you walk into a room, and automatically assume that others have everything together, know what they are doing, and are doing well in life while assuming that you are a complete mess. In order to put someone else on a pedestal, you have to put yourself down. In order to see someone else as being above you, you have to see yourself as less than. This poor self-image is the result of a wounded ego, the aspect of the wounded ego that does not allow you to see the positive qualities in yourself, and to only see them in others. To learn more about this check out my blog post on the wounded ego.
I would like to clarify the attraction point: it is not that we specifically attract these types of people into our lives, but our lack of healthy boundaries and discernment prevents us from recognizing these types of individuals and filtering them out of our lives.
To learn more, watch the video below
Full transcript of the video "Why are we drawn to narcissists?"
Why are we drawn to narcissists? I’m also going to be covering the question of why we attract narcissists because attraction is a two-way street- two opposite polarities are always going to be attracted to each other. It’s very common for a lot of empaths and highly sensitive people to be a match to these types of situations and relationships.
One of the reasons why is because people who are very emotionally sensitive have the tendency to get easily confused. this is something that I have really struggled with along my path and something that I really had to learn to grow out of. It’s the idea that just because you can sense what others are feeling that you might have something to do with it. This is where the inner child of the empath tends to have this self blaming type of attitude, and this sense of a huge burden of responsibility. So they take on much more responsibility than they should and take on much more responsibility than is healthy for one person to do.
So where as the narcissist will take zero responsibility and say, “nothing is my fault, everything is every one else’s fault”, this empathic person will say, “everything is my fault”. And it doesn’t matter what it is, it could have absolutely nothing to do with them but through their inner child, and that faulty inner child reasoning they are going to think, “this is my fault”.
The most common example of this is when parents get divorced. The child is going to think, “this is my fault”, but it is not the child’s fault, it has nothing to do with the child, it is the parents relationship with each other and that shouldn’t impact or have anything to do with how they treat the child. The child might think, “mommy and daddy are getting divorced because of me, because I’m bad, because I’m a bad kid”.
Being very psychic, intuitive and emotionally sensitive makes you very open to the energies of other people. It makes you much more likely to internalize the energies of other people. So, if someone is coming at you with blind conviction of whatever delusion they might have, or just their perception of you. For example if somebody looks at you and thinks that you have no integrity, and they keep telling you that you have no integrity, and challenging you that way or treating you that way and you are still developing and really open to the energy around you, you might just internalize that without questioning it because you have no boundaries; you really have no boundaries to the point where you can’t tell where others end and you begin. This is something that I really had to work through, and the more psychically sensitive you are the more you have to work at it because you are just walking around like a giant sponge all the time so you really have to learn to tame that.
So for those of you that don’t resonate with that aspect, another underlying core reason why we attract narcissists is an addiction to emotions. This is a big thing because you can be addicted to negative emotions, self-sabotage and self destruction. It’s one of those things that can be really tricky, but the way that I explain it is this: it is the emotional manifestation of cutting. People who cut themselves do it because it makes them feel better, it gives them a sense of control, and it feels better than the pain that they were feeling before. they’re hurting themselves because they feel that they deserve it. So people who are addicted to heavy negative emotions that are self destructive, self sabotaging, they are doing a form of emotional cutting so to speak in that they are creating these situations or drawing in these situations where they feel these really high highs and really low lows; and because the lows are so low they emphasize the highs and they reinforce these negative core beliefs and feelings that you have about yourself, about your worthlessness about how you don’t deserve love, about how you are inherently a bad person. The person you are drawing in is a person who is reflecting all of this back to you. What tends to happen is that when we don’t get the message right away, it comes back louder and louder and louder until there is such a build-up of momentum and energy that it forces us to make a change. So for example if you are somebody who needs to set boundaries and you keep getting the message that you need to set boundaries, but you are not really listening- and I don’t want to say that you are not listening, you probably think that you are listening but at the same time you don’t really know what it is to fully set boundaries in a healthy way, then you are just going to keep experiencing people overstepping your boundaries until it culminates and possibly turns into a whole group of people disrespecting your boundaries. So for example, drawing in a cyber-bully, drawing in trolls, drawing in a whole group of people trying to bully you- that kind of thing, that is a huge message of you needing to learn self respect and boundaries.
So one of the emotions that can be most addictive- and I am speaking from personal experience, I used to be addicted to these emotions and I didn’t even realize what I was doing. I really came from having healed and worked a lot on these really heavy patterns of self abuse which are very self destructive, very self sabotaging and just drawing in types of people who would reinforce this abuse and that’s because this is what I thought love was. If you grew up watching any kind of soap opera, they are built on those themes. Most soap operas- especially Pakistani and Indian ones, are built around one psychopathic character, I would say its in every drama. I don’t watch that many soap operas but there is one Turkish one I really liked – Magnificent Century, and they really have similar themes of inciting heavy emotions. The reasons these drama, soap-operas and TV shows are so popular is because people are really addicted to these emotions and they vicariously experience those emotions through watching them on screen. So one of the emotions we can be really addicted to is that self-destructive, self-sabotaging emotion where you will unconsciously sabotage good things in your life because you don’t believe or trust that you can really have it, so you will sabotage, sabotage and sabotage until it blows up in your face. What that tends to do is, in terms of relationships or friendships- you will let in all the wrong people and all the good people that are around you, you just won’t feel an attraction to them- you won’t feel drawn to them, you’ll feel that there is something off about them or something missing. Whatever is it, you’re not going to feel that draw because there is a part of you that is seeking that high. The reason that high, that drama can be so addictive is because you get to feel like you are in your own super movie, you get to feel like there is always something exciting happening in your life, whether it is positive or not. Let me tell you, peace- when you are coming out of that super dramatic life, peace can be really, really boring. This is something that we don’t really talk about especially when it comes to romance and dating, it’s all focused on this energy of fulfilment; fulfilment which is based on this energy of longing or desire, which is having that tiny carrot for a second and then boom, it gets taken away. It’s all based on the whole question, “is it going to happen? is it not going to happen?”. So a lot of us get addicted to that because it makes our lives feel more exciting, but when you actually find a genuine partner who is a really great match for you and you experience that love that everybody talks about, that peace is not filled with drama. Drama and peace are two very separate energies. So peace, when you are used to all that drama might feel really boring at first, but once you get used to it and you learn to get used to a different way of being you learn not to accept abuse as love anymore or to confuse abuse as love anymore, and you learn how to have healthy relating habits and a healthy relationship with yourself, that’s when you move into a whole new level of experience and your heart chakra is going to open so wide- it’s really one of the best feelings and experiences that you can have. So when it comes to this emotional addiction you really have to get to the core of it, understanding within yourself, “What is it within me that wants to experience this negative emotion? What is it within me that keeps drawing this in? Why am I so addicted to making this choice?”. If you’re feeling really, really low and really, really bad about yourself, then that feeling of emotional cutting – and the reason I call it emotional cutting is because on an energetic level, that is literally what it feels like. So let’s say you are creating a self sabotaging or self destructive situation for yourself, let’s say you are dating someone and you are having a fight with them, if you ever notice when you self destruct- you start at a neutral emotion which will be boredom- and that’ where drama begins to kick in because drama is a means to avoid or escape ourselves when we are feeling bored and we don’t want to face ourselves. So that’s where drama starts to creep in, and that boredom turns into negativity, that negativity turns into anger, anger turns into rage, that turns into sadness, then it turns into grief, it keeps spiralling down until eventually you hit despair, which is the lowest on the vibrational scale that you can be. It’s not necessarily that it’s a terrible thing but when you’re in the vibration of despair and powerless, that’s when you attract a narcissist who believe it or not is actually holding a slightly higher vibration in the sense that they are holding the vibration of rage and anger. So if you think about the vibration of rage and anger, it is higher on the vibrational scale than despair and powerlessness. Despair and powerlessness are the lowest that you can be on this scale. This is the epitome of victim consciousness. So as long as you are playing the victim in your life or holding onto the role of the victim in your life you will be a match to a perpetrator- a perpetrator who is operating out of anger, out of rage, out of that fear based mentality. Why? Because they are looking for someone to overpower, they are looking for someone who has poor boundaries, they are looking for someone who wants to harm themselves, because that’s what they enjoy doing, that’s what they are looking for to. They are also addicted to drama, they are also addicted to negative emotions, they are also highly self destructive, highly self sabotaging. The main difference is that people who draw in narcissists have a very poor self image, they think very lowly of themselves to the point where you might not even realize you are doing this. It’s not like you walk around every and say, “I’m going to be a victim today!”, that’s really not how it works. It could be as simple as, let’s say you walk into a room and you are at a dinner party. You see all these other people around you and you are just imagining and thinking about how they must be so great, and their lives must be so great and they must have it all together, and then you look at yourself and feel like you are a total mess who has no idea what you are doing. It’s one of those things where you automatically have a poor image of yourself and you automatically assume everyone else to be amazing, you put other people on pedestals while knocking yourself down.
What narcissists do is that they put themselves on pedestals and they want other people that are going to worship them and put them on pedestals too to reinforce their inflated self image.
So in a way you end up being the perfect match because you provide each other with exactly what you need, what you are both consciously or subconsciously seeking. You provide each other with the drama, with the excitement, with the self sabotage, with the self-destruction, with the really high highs and the really low lows; you’re going to worship the narcissist, put them on a pedestal and they are going to keep you knocked off of your pedestal, and that’s really what you are looking for. It’s the subconscious reinforcement of the negative beliefs that you have about yourself and about the fact that you are not good or you are inherently a bad person. It’s one of those things where you have to understand that when you have a lot of heart energy there’s a lot of innocence with that, so when it comes to that innocence, that energy, you are more likely to internalize things about yourself that aren’t even true, without questioning them because in your pure innocence you are just internalizing everything that is coming towards you whether it is merited or not. So with that childlike innocence you don’t have the idea in your mind to think, “Is this person lying? Is this person being dishonest with me? Does this person have a negative agenda towards me?”. That’s because your solar plexus chakra, the area right above your belly is completely out of whack. This is the part of you that tells you your gut instinct, that tells you about who is right for you, who is not right for you, who to let in, who not to let in, and it’s going to let you know which ways to go. That is the part of you that can sense when you are in an environment that is really dangerous for you, whether physically or emotionally or even spiritually, its going to let you know.
So the second chakra that ties into this is the third eye chakra. Narcissists can only manipulate people who are very confused. they can only manipulate people who are deeply confused about themselves because they play on that confusion to twist you into believing whatever they want you to believe about yourself so that you can serve them with your energy. Keep in mind that this is a two way street. So they are providing you something that you are subconsciously wanting and you are giving them something that they are subconsciously wanting, and this comes down to the emotional self sabotage and self destruction. So it doesn’t necessarily mean that you are consciously asking to feel in pain, but there is a part of you that is so addicted to the drama and the negative emotions that you might not even realize what you are finding yourself drawn to. So now that we are exploring the third eye chakra point, if you are very confused then this chakra is closed. An open third eye chakra is able to see truth, it’s able to discern, it’s able to see with clarity and it’s able to perceive reality clearly free of illusion, free of hallucination, free of past trauma. The energy of confusion, the energy of unhealed trauma- they really distort this energy center to the point where you can’t see clearly. I recently posted on my Instagram @rushaspeaks about how if you have an unhealed wound, unhealed trauma from the past, you are going to be projecting it onto your future and its’ going to affect the lens through which you see your present moment, even to the point of people’s faces around you morphing into the face of the person who abused you or attacked you in the past. This can go really intensely, this is why it’s really important to hold yourself accountable, take responsibility, really be willing to look at yourself so that you can recognize these things and clear them away and live in an empowered way and move towards where you want to go which is what I am hoping for you! So let’s do it! So when it comes to the third eye you really have to learn to discover yourself, to trust yourself. Most people who are in this state- which is a lot of people, most people who are in this state don’t come up with information for themselves. They look for other people to spoon feed them what they should believe, how they should feel about things. One of the biggest examples you can see of this is gossip. So a lot of people take gossip and they just assume things to be true. So for example if they trust someone and that person tells them something about another person, they’re just going to assume it to be true without questioning anything. Even to the point of something being so blatantly, obviously wrong and a lie in front of them but they are so spoon fed and so disempowered, they’re third eye is full on shut, to the point where they cannot even see what’s happening in front of them.
The biggest example I can give for this is trolls in mythology. It’s really interesting how we call haters trolls because there is a mythical connection there. When it comes to trolls, one of the legends explored in the TV show Merlin is that they have the ability to do enchantment magic, which is to hide their true form. If you are under this enchantment, even if they show their true form, you won’t be able to see them for what they really are. So there is one episode where the king falls in love with a troll. She disguises herself as a beautiful woman and puts an enchantment on him so he falls in love. When her enchantment stops working and everybody else sees her as a troll, the king is still sitting there looking at her with eyes of love. Well this is literally how it is when it comes to a narcissist. For those of you who have been able to see through the narcissist and see the mask come off, you are literally like the king who has broken the enchantment and able to see the troll for what they truly were and what they were truly representing. So when it comes to narcissists and their smear campaigns, this is when they will do anything in their power to try and slander you, they will make up any lie, tell any lie, with so much conviction just to convince people of how bad you are because they want to make you look bad and strip any of your credibility away so that no one else will discover their true nature, so that they can keep their jig going. You know how they say, “The jig is up”? So it’s kind of like that. They can only manipulate people whose third eyes are closed, they can only manipulate people who don’t know how to think for themselves, they can only manipulate people who are deeply confused. so you have to remember in times like that, that is another sign for you to just be deeply rooted in your truth and in who you are. Once you get past that sense of emotional confusion, and I know it can be hard because it’s a process, it’s like peeling an onion; but the more you get past that the less people will be able to abuse you, because you will trust yourself and you will know in your heart and soul what is true for you. This is a muscle that you really need to develop, it’s a muscle of integrity, of really knowing yourself, of really having strong boundaries, of really respecting yourself. The thing about narcissists, and when I talk about this I am referring to this on a scale. Often times when you are dealing with this type of personality, you may also be dealing with a sociopath or a psychopath. So it starts with a narcissist, which is kind of like the lowest on the scale, and then you have sociopath and then you have psychopath. So a sociopath is someone who maybe has some chance of feeling guilt or remorse, but maybe they continue anyway- it is an antisocial personality disorder, and then psychopaths just full on don’t care. So it’s different levels of personality disorders. The reason I want to bring this up is because not everyone is automatically a narcissist, just because you have a bad experience with them. It’s a very specific personality disorder and it does happen on different scales. So someone can be slightly narcissistic, there are some who display this energy of pure evil and others that don’t, it is nuanced and it is a touchy subject, but one of the things I am exploring right now is the idea that no one is purely bad or purely good, we are all just different mixtures and expressions of energy. So the thing about sociopaths and psychopaths is that they exhibit extreme forms of what you could describe as demonic energy. I don’t really know if that’s the best term, but basically there are a few traits that really describe them, and it is pathological lying, and not having any empathy, and when it comes to sociopaths and psychopaths they are higher up on the criminal scale when it come to the law, so they break laws ,they do not care about stuff like that and again, that happens on a scale too. So I am saying all of this from my own personal experience, I am not a licensed psychiatrist so this is just from my own opinion. Of course I always invite you to do your own research and look into these things on your own. It’s really good to be informed about them, there are so many free resources online when it comes to mental health that you can look into if you are wanting to do more research about psychological disorders.
To summarize, the main points of this video are: Being in victim consciousness, having a really poor self image, being addicted to emotions- experiencing really high highs and low lows, and looking to others to tell you how to feel about yourself.
But if you want to learn more about the chakras and how they impact you and how they impact your life, I am currently working on a series of guidebooks that explore the different chakras and how they impact different areas of your life. I am almost done the root chakra guide. In this guide I explore how things like your daily routine, self defeatism, self sabotage, self destruction, feelings of safety, scarcity consciousness versus abundance consciousness, self neglect- these are all core issues that I explore in how they impact your root chakra and how to balance them. So I call it root chakra really just to encompass all of these issues, but this guide is focused on being able to create structure in your life to get to where you want to go, being able to ground, being able to take really good care of yourself and to build a really strong, solid foundation for yourself so that you can explore the other areas of life in a healthy and empowered way. So there is a lot to be learned there. I really hope you found this video helpful and if you are interested in my work, make sure to sign up for my newsletter for updates!
When: February 19th, at 10:53 AM EST
Effects: Full moon effects can be felt a few days prior, and a few days afterwards. If sensitive to planetary shifts, especially the moon, its influence may be felt in the weeks before.
I can already feel the energy of this full moon penetrating every ounce of my core. This full moon has a strong healing and cleansing energy to it. Themes for this full moon include practicality, balance, healing, divine love, and seeing the mystical and magical in the everyday and ordinary – sacred ordinariness
1. Heart Chakra Awakening
How do you receive love?
Pisces is the sign of universal love. In its exalted form, it is the ultimate divine, cosmic love. We are moving through blocks previously experienced when it came to receiving love. Virgo, in its imbalanced form is an incessant giver, and has trouble receiving or asking for their needs to be met.
- In which ways do you have trouble receiving love, or asking for your needs to be met?
- In which ways are you passive about meeting your desires?
- What are your love languages and how can you communicate that to those closest to you?
This is about recognizing and acknowledging those blocks, and allowing love in, allowing yourself to be fully supported by love and life. It is safe to trust now. It is safe to receive.
2. Releasing Traumas from the Past
Remember, you are not your past. Abuse is never your fault. Do not carry the burdens of abuse, especially and including emotional and psychological abuse which can be trickier to identify.
Experiencing trauma clouds our perceiving lenses. If we experienced abuse with Person B from our past, it doesn’t matter how wonderful Person Y is- if we have not healed from that experience, we will continue to project the past onto the future. Trauma keeps us stuck in the past, anxiously navigating in our minds to avoid further pain or trauma in the future. The neurotic, anxious, obsessive compulsive shadow side of virgo keeps us stuck in our minds, incessantly overthinking things in order to emotionally survive. This full moon gives us to opportunity to heal and purify, opening up to allow fresh and new energy into our lives.
2. Clarity & Balance
This also applies to our work lives. The past few months work-life balance has been a very important theme. In which ways do you neglect different aspects of your life to overly focus on another? The virgo-pisces axis calls for balance. Balance between planning, preparing, organizing, and flowing, receiving, being guided. While virgo wants to plan and know what to expect, and know what is coming, pisces demands that you flow in the moment. While virgo demands that you face reality, pisces demands that you see the magic around you. This is the essence of magical ordinariness, the knowing that magic isn’t in some distant realm far away, magic is here with you in the everyday, the practical things as well as the routine.
3. Profound dreams and visions
Lots of healing is occurring in dreams. Do not be alarmed if you see a few scary images. Do not take the symbols literally. Your subconscious may be trying to communicate something to you, through a specific scenario or face. Acknowledge your astral experience, and ask your internal guide to help you interpret the messages. Dream journaling is a powerful way to do this. Trust that past fears, traumas and difficult scenarios are being released as you sleep. This is clearing the way for new love, new energy and new ways of being and relating to come in. What has been your routine before – routine emotions, routine thoughts, routine reactions, routine traumas, routine stories– will no longer exist. You are stepping into a new level of magic and healing, flowing through the healing waters of pisces, swimming in divine love, while grounding in the practical wisdom and ritual purity of virgo. It is time for a new routine, one that truly honours your heart and soul.
4. Awakening – new gifts & shifting our perception
We are no longer seeing through the clouded lenses of illusion or trauma. Each time we heal, integrate and balance, we activate new portals of energy inside of ourselves; we activate new levels of gifts, and new realities. The integration of the virgo-pisces access gives us the ability to dream, heal, but also to see reality clearly. When these energies are imbalanced, there is a tendency to completely focus on one aspect of life while neglecting others (imbalanced virgo energy), or to refuse to see reality or face yourself and get caught up in illusion that distracts you from yourself (imbalanced piscean energy). For those who seek to truly grow, you will no longer be susceptible to external distractions taking you away from yourself.
Virgo, being the sign of physical healing, and pisces being the sign of spiritual healing, merge to help you move into a whole new paradigm that is activated once you truly acknowledge and face yourself. Integration is a powerful theme right now. Allow yourself to discover the new with curiosity. Pay attention to any new gifts being revealed to you. Open up to receive guidance and communion with the divine.
How do you feel about this full moon’s energy?
Let me know in the comments below!
Perpetrators often target highly sensitive, empathic people. For an empath that has not connected with their gifts- they are especially prone to emotional confusion, and an unnatural sense of duty or responsibility to others around them. They may take responsibility for every thing- thinking that every thing is their fault, including a complete possibly psychopathic or sociopathic stranger attacking them online, or perhaps someone close to you. Whether it’s a stranger online, or someone once close to you revealing their true colours, when you are easily emotionally confused, others will prey on this to make you take responsibility for things that are not your fault, or to trap you in a parasitic relationship where they try to feed off of your emotional, psychological or sexual humiliation. This article explores how to prevent that from happening, and how to remove yourself from this situation in a clear, concise and timely manner to protect your energy, and give yourself space to explore and heal so that this type of situation cannot interfere with your life, nor your physical, mental, emotional or spiritual wellbeing. You deserve the very best, including recognizing and walking away from abuse. Abuse is never your fault.
- Completely remove yourself from the situation
- Do not look at anything being said about you. Do not watch any videos, do not read any hateful comments, completely disengage, and do not look at it at all. Have a trusted friend administer your accounts, or comb through in case there is anything that requires legal or police intervention.
- Do not engage with this individual or any of their enablers or fellow perpetrators. Other people will try to engage you, discuss the situation with you, or drag you back into the drama. Do not engage with them. Accept support from those who are genuine, but if anything feels off or coloured with drama, block, delete and sleep like a baby.
- Do not invest any energy into trying to prove them wrong or expose their lies. This will create an energy exchange and add energy to the conflict, which is exactly what this person wants. They are trying to provoke you into becoming fuel for their story. Don’t give them the satisfaction. Let them starve. Keep your precious, bright energy for you, and you alone. You decide who gets to benefit from it.
- Do not worry about what is being said about you or what people think. The cyberbully will do anything they can to elicit a response of humiliation from you. They will try to slander you, to destroy you, make up any story, tell any lie to further their agenda. Those with open hearts and discernment will see right through it. Only those that are very confused will be susceptible to being misled, or those that secretly enjoy drama and tearing others down will engage. These people are not for you, and you are not missing out on anything from them having a distorted opinion of you. It is their loss. Allow people to engage in their fantasies and delusions, it is not of your concern.
- Do NOT take it personally. It’s very possible that this individual has an antisocial personality disorder -sociopathy or psychopathy. Their actions have absolutely nothing to do with you. They are simply using you as a pawn to gain power, or further their own agenda. Their actions may also be motivated by extreme jealousy. There is no reasoning with this type of individual. It is not your responsibility to heal this person. Walk away. Regain your inner peace, hold your internal balance and equilibrium.
- Fill your life with activities and things that bring you joy. Surround yourself with trusted loved ones. Spend time with friends who love you and want to see you happy, grow and win in life. Make yourself the priority in your life. Do things that you have always wanted to do. Invest in yourself physically, spiritually, mentally and emotionally. Read new books, visit new places, meet new people and try new things.
- If this situation is involving someone close to you, try to keep new connections casual, until you take the time to heal. it’s important to regain trust in yourself before you make any decisions about who to let in. If this situation involves a complete stranger, practice discernment about which energies you engage with or let in online. Simple things like watching a video or listening to someone’s voice, can connect you into their energy. Responding to their taunts or worrying about what people are thinking of you creates an energy exchange and adds fuel to the fire they are so desperately trying to create. Do not give it your precious energy.
- This is where we go into the part that made you a match to this situation in the first place. This is not an excuse for self blame, self shame or self punishment. You obviously did not wish for this to happen in your life. Experiencing abuse is never your fault and you are always doing the best that you can with the knowledge, self awareness, healing, resources and information that you have available to you at any moment in time. What makes you a match to a bully?
- Poor self image, lack of/unhealthy boundaries, powerlessness and victim consciousness. Focus on empowering yourself in every way that you can. Bullies do not choose empowered, self loving individuals with healthy boundaries. They target those with weaker boundaries, who they feel they can manipulate and control, or conversely, they seek to destroy those who they cannot manipulate and control. Once they find that you are not engaging with them, or giving them the response that they seek, they will move on to something else.
- Examples of negative self talk, beliefs or behaviours that create a vibrational match to powerlessness or victimhood:
- feeling not enough
- feeling unlovable/ unworthy of love
- lack of self acceptance
- extreme or harsh self criticism – this is self criticism that is destructive, rather than constructive
- internal policing (internally policing every single thing that you do to avoid punishment or scrutiny from others)
- unhealthy perfectionism
- self destructive tendencies
- self sabotage
What is the difference between constructive criticism and destructive criticism?
Destructive criticism is designed to hurt and undermine you. Constructive criticism is designed to help you, to lift you up, help you do better and help you improve.Trust your inner instincts to let you know what inherently feels off to you. There is a huge difference between someone trying to help you because they love you and genuinely want to see you happy and succeed, and someone who seeks to destroy and diminish you because they fear you.
A cyber bully trying to get under your skin is akin to someone trying to break into your home. This is somebody who is forcibly trying to engage with your energy, and create an energy exchange or a relationship so that they can benefit from it in a parasitic way. This individual does not want to see you win, does not want to see you happy and certainly does not want you to connect with your power. Completely cut away and remove yourself from this energy in your life. Focus on you, your self love, your joy, your well being. Focus on what gives you strength and makes you feel good. You have the power to control your inner environment. This is the perfect opportunity for you to exercise your mental, emotional and spiritual power with Jedi like strength. And remember, if someone is so vehemently attacking you, you can be sure they know you are destined for great things.
Easier said than done, I know.
I used to worry so much about what everyone thought of me. I was always trying to please people, and do things that would make me look acceptable in their eyes. Now, I honestly don’t give a f*ck. Being exposed to the dark side of social media has been the best thing that ever happened to me. It freed me. I learned to realize that you can’t control how people see you. Complete strangers will try to act like they know you. People will make up stories about you. Jealous haters will try to destroy you. I used to take it all so personally, wondering why my mere existence would make people so upset.
Here’s what I’ve learned:
People who are filled with hate, will always seek to destroy. That’s their weakness. They are filled with hate and think that displaying it makes them stronger, when in truth, it shows the world how truly weak they are. People who criticize you destructively, and react to you negatively simply because you exist- don’t want you to be powerful and strong. It makes them feel bad about themselves. People who have no self esteem don’t want you to know your power. People who fear truth don’t want to face or live in reality. People who want all the beauty in the world don’t want you to be beautiful, just like people who want all the power in the world don’t want you to be powerful.
So the next time someone criticizes you destructively, have empathy for them, especially if it’s a stranger on social media. The person so vehemently attacking you is a very weak and broken individual. Your haters are actually the most obsessed with you. And remember, they will obsess and criticize you no matter what you do, so do whatever the f*ck you want.
Take every negative comment designed to destroy you, and use it to fuel your realization of how incredibly magical you are. After all, if people are so obsessed with destroying you, or taking time out of their life to study you, observe you, consume your content, and try to destroy you with hate, you must be pretty f*cking magical and intriguing 💁🏽♀️ #celebrateyou
Transcript of: How to get revenge on the narcissist or the person that hurt you.
If you are seeking revenge, you are probably somebody who is feeling really powerless right now. The whole idea of revenge stems from deep powerlessness.
If you are familiar with astrology, we have this thing called the 7th house. The 7th house describes your relationships, but in traditional astrology it describes your bonded lovers and your enemies- any marriage, or long term commitment. It describes your serious relationships and your enemies. That’s really interesting. Why would you want the sector of your life that is dedicated to your close business relationships, love partnerships and friendships- with your enemies? These are people you don’t want to have any connection with- so why is this?
When you get a restraining order against someone, that person needs to have access to your location at all times. Isn’t that so ironic? The person you are getting a restraining order against needs to know where you are in order to know where to stay away from. The very person you are trying to get away from gets access to where you are at all times. This keeps you contractually, and energetically bonded to the very person you are trying to get away from. How ironic is that?
The reason I bring up these analogies is because it points to the energetic agreement that happens between two people when you have this tumultuous agreement. If you are referring to someone as your enemy- that my friends, is a relationship.
*please take these analogies with a grain of salt. They are to illustrate a point, not teach about legal matters.
If you have this kind of relationship with someone. “I want to get revenge on this person, this person really hurt me, this person’s my enemy” thinking of someone as an enemy. If you think of them and get a feeling of disgust and revulsion, you are energetically tied to that person. As long as you want to get revenge on someone you are energetically tied to them. There is a part of you that is taking that experience with that person and attributing it so much meaning, giving it so much meaning that you are unconsciously keeping yourself attached to the very thing that you are trying to get away from.
This will actually blow your mind but it’s the truth.
Them ore you decide that you want to hate someone- you know how they say that there is a fine line between love and hate, this is what they are talking about. Trauma bonding is powerful. This is why if you are somebody who has dealt with a narcissist, they are going to use that tool, because narcissists are people who feel very insignificant and they thrive on feeling powerful. Every single thing that they do is for show, to get attention and to get a sense of significance. So if they don’t feel that they can be significant to you because you see them for what they truly are, they are going to try and feel significant to you in a negative way. Both ways are negative because we are talking about a severe personality disorder here- but when I talk about the negative way – they are going to try and forcibly invade your aura, invade your space, thrust themselves upon you no matter how that looks so that you remember them. So if you are watching this video because you feel really powerless after having dealt this a narcissist or you feel like something happened in your life that was unfair and you are trying to figure out how to get over it…
I want to offer you a new perspective.
If someone is in so much pain and feels so powerless, so worthless, that they are willing to do anything to make themselves feel that sense of significance, even if its going out and hurting other people, even if its endlessly trying to put themselves in someone else’s face or space, that’s a really sad place to be in. I’m not saying that you have to have empathy for this person- that’s probably the last thing you want to do right now. I’m saying it to appreciate where you are. You have the capacity to feel love. The thing about narcissists is that they will surround themselves with people, getting attention and feeding that endless empty hole, but if they do not get out of that, they don’t experience love. They can be surrounded by so many people and still don’t experience that sense of connection and love. Its like being so hungry, that all you want to do is feast but you can’t even enjoy the feeling that comes from eating that food. You eat and you eat but you can’t taste it, you don’t experience the delicious scent of the food, the textures of the food, the amazing feeling of having a delicious meal after you’ve been starving for months. That’s something to be grateful for, because you have the capacity to love, you have the capacity to connect with other people. If you are watching this video, you have not been setting healthy boundaries. If you are watching this video you are projecting an ideal self onto other people instead of seeing the red flags that are being shown to you. If you are watching this video, you don’t believe in your own power, worthiness and importance so you are attracting in people who have an amplified sense of that and you are projecting that aspect of you onto that person instead of reclaiming it for yourself.
It’s time for you to step back into making YOU the most powerful person in your life, making you the most important person in your life because you are.
The reason I go into all of this is because if you hold on to that idea of revenge, you’re energetically keeping yourself attached to them. Don’t beat yourself up if thoughts of those person come into your mind, if you have dreams where that person shows up this is all a part of the healing process. Time heals everything. But the biggest tool you can use to heal is shifting your perception. It’s all about the meaning you assign to what happened. If you experience something awful and negative in your life and you assign meaning to it – “you do this to me and this happened and I have to get revenge on them and make sure they suffer” – I want you to think about your motivation here. Everything that you are pursuing is about making that person feel something and this is coming from a sense of powerlessness because your focus is all about that person its not hat about you. Do you see how this whole path is about avoiding yourself, avoiding the pain that you feel inside? And its perpetuating this victim cycle of needing to make that person feel something. As long as you are in that cycle you are going to attract others doing the same thing – others in the victim/perpetrator cycle. The whole purpose of this article is to help you get out of it. Don’t worry about them getting their just desserts – they are already getting theirs everyday- they don’t have the ability to feel love. That’s like going to see the biggest diamond on the planet and not even being able to experience the beauty of it. What does anything mean if you have nobody to genuinely share it with? If you surround yourself with people but you can’t even connect with them. If you put on this persona to get people to love you, but they’re still not seeing the real you. So be grateful. Be grateful that you have the opportunity to heal and grow and walk away from this and actually have deep connections with people.
Chances are if you are watching this video you are something with a very open heart – a very big, very open heart, and that’s why you’ll draw in these types of people that take advantage of that. If you have a very big heart ,but you haven’t stepped in your power yet, you probably get emotionally confused easily and there are people who will take advantage of that. Not everyone- most people in the world are good hearted people but when you come across these types of individuals, it can be really disheartening, it can make you feel really bitter inside, really angry at how f*cked up the world feels to you. But as long as you keep yourself in that mindset you are not doing anyone any favours ,especially not yourself. So the best thing you could do is to change that meaning. If somebody treated you badly in your life, and this can range in a number of different ways – let’s say it’s a f*ckboy who is trying to make you feel worthless and used, let’s say it’s a narcissist whose trying to cyber bully you or bully you in person and turn people against you- that’s what they do, it’s a game they enjoy. Whatever it was- don’t give it that meaning.
Take that meaning away, make the experience irrelevant, and then you are truly free.
This is where you have to be wiling to not take things personally, because the things that other people do are not about you. You are always drawing in reflections, for you to learn and grow, so if you drew in a narcissist, or you drew in a psychopath, you my friend, need ots et boundaries. You need to learn to trust yourself. And this is what happens, when you have a very open heart and a very open energy, you’re going to draw in all sorts of people. You have to filter through them. With practice it gets a lot easier, and this is about tuning into your instinct and trusting your instinct. We always know. If you have a big heart, you are intuitive. Your intuition always tells you, you just discount it or don’t trust it. But when you get back in touch with that ability, it gets stronger and stronger every time. If you are watching this, then you are ready to do that. That’s a huge leap to take. You are stepping into a whole new way of being and leaving victim consciousness behind. You are shifting into something so powerful in your life. I’m so proud of you if you are at a stage in your life where you are ready for this, because this is not easy. It’s not easy to step into your power and take responsibility and accept accountability for your life and what you allow into your energy. It’s so much easier to blame other people, to play the victim, to get focused on revenge. When you can step back and not take life personally, you can understand that life is only ever trying to help you. Nothing that ever happens in personal. Yeah okay, you had a shitty experience. It sucks. I get it. But the reason it happened is because it was something for you to learn form or you needed to set boundaries.
There’s something to learn from every experience.
If you are drawing in a narcissist it just represents the aspect of you that is wanting to feel more important in your life. If you are drawing in a narcissist you are the type of person that gives your power away all the time to people around you, you’re always putting other people first, you’re letting other people make decisions for you, you’re not trusting yourself, you’re not trusting your instincts, you’re putting yourself last, and that’s why you’re drawing in this person because you’re looking at someone who puts themselves first at all costs which is also imbalanced- but the reason you are drawing that in is because it represents the other extreme. That person represents something about your shadow, that part of you that wants to feel like it wants to be more important but maybe you feel selfish for doing that, maybe you feel like it’s bad or wrong to do that, so accept it. We’re so obsessed with this idea of us being completely good, narcissists included, everybody included, society included. We’re so obsessed with this idea of being good that we’ll do anything possible to make ourselves the good guy and make the other the bad guy. We are all mixed with light and dark and that is a beautiful thing. Do you how nasty something would taste if it wasn’t balanced? If it was all sugar and no salt? You need salt in your dessert in order to balance it out and make the flavours pop. I love my shadow!
Featured Image: Weheartit.com